One of the most frequent questions I get asked is where did it all begin? Those of you who have followed Femme Fatale Airsoft from the beginning will know the story behind Femme Fatale Airsoft but for my newer followers I thought it would be a cool idea to dedicate a blog post to the story of FFA. I hope this gives you more of an insight on how FFA grew into what it is today.

So where did it all begin?

I played my first Airsoft game in February 2011 for one of my female best friend's birthdays - her boyfriend was really into Airsoft so we thought 'why not give it a go?' I went with an open mind and with my partner at the times kit ready to see what the crack was. That day was a less than enjoyable experience - we set off really early on a cold, wet morning and travelled to Nottingham to an Airsoft site that was a tiny area of woodland with an abandoned caravan and a portaloo (it didn't look promising), the plate carrier was so heavy and bulky on me that I could barely move, it rained and as it was a woodland site without much drainage we got soaked and caked in mud, I got shot in the face whilst trying to change a battery that died on me in the middle of a game and to top it all off I got told by an older male player that I was the one they were going to 'pillage, plunder and rape' after this I decided Airsoft was not for me. (Please excuse the horrendous trigger discipline in the photo!)

Fast forward to August 2014 and my partner decided for his birthday that he wanted to play a private Skirmish at a local site, being the sassyMF I am I told him I would only play if he brought me the pink G&G FF26 thinking that this would NEVER happen! Fast forward 2 weeks later and a large Zero One Airsoft package arrived at my home - it was the G&G FF26! So with no excuses off we went. This time however it was completely different story - the site was bigger with more cover and structures meaning the game play flowed a lot better, the facilities on site were leaps and bounds ahead and because it was a private skirmish with just our friends the banter between the teams was great. Although it was running my own kit what really made the day for me.

I have always said that I am an unlikely candidate for Airsoft or was an unlikely candidate for Airsoft - I graduated from University with a 2:1 in Textile Design and worked as a Trainee Fashion Buyer and Merchandiser, I was obsessed with Fashion, shoes and the typical 'celebrity lifestyle' of my favourite models Tyra Banks etc and had my heart set on living in London to become a Textile for Fashion Designer, I wasn't very active and I hated getting wet/muddy and the idea of getting covered in BB welts did not appeal to me in the slightest. My job as a Trainee Fashion Buyer heavily weighs into how Femme Fatale Airsoft came to be. Only a few months after I accepted my Graduate job, my position was made redundant - I was gutted but in hindsight it appears to have been a blessing in disguise. I started looking for new employment the day it was announced and had interviews the next week (I don't like to wait around!) but unfortunately I was involved in a car accident that wrote off my beloved first car that same week - a 2005 plate Aegean blue Peugeot 206 and the accident left me with injuries to my neck, shoulders and back.

With no job, injured and the loss of my car it was fair to say I was pretty down on my luck. I had nothing to get up for in the morning, except physio to counteract the injuries from the accident so on top of everything I was pretty down on myself too. One day whilst watching some crappy daytime TV I decided to trawl the internet looking for new Airsoft kit for when I could start playing again and something stood out to me: there was barely any kit for women and there wasn't a lot of inspiration and information for women in our sport. I found a couple of YouTubers that were female: Airsoft Hasmeen, Adella Relentless and Unicorn Leah and started religiously watching their channels, alongside this I started checking out popular Airsoft blogs and thought 'why isn't there a blog out there aimed at women?'... *LIGHTBULB*

I opened my desk drawers and pulled out a notepad to start jotting down ideas for blog posts - what did I want to see? What did I want to know? were my main questions, but being a newbie myself - to Airsoft and blogging, it was going to be a massive learning curve. Armed with a few images for Instagram, a notebook of ideas and very very basic kit I created my blog and an Instagram page the same day and set about writing my first blog article. I only ever expected to get a few readers but I figured if I could help at least one other female Airsofter, the blog will have served its purpose, but it appears that would not be the case - the blog and Instagram exploded.

Whilst FFA was gaining in popularity, myself along with a few other friends who attended the private Skirmish we created a team and committed to playing once a month, as I'd really caught the bug for Airsoft we started playing twice a month and then I got the taste of CQB - I had found the Airsoft buzz I craved! To this day I have only played 2 woodland Skirmish days since my first game of CQB back in December 2014. After discovering CQB and really getting a feel for it, I decided to start travelling further afield for game days and it wasn't uncommon for me to drive 300 mile round trips to sites. After my first 'away day' at Ironsight Airsoft in Andover in April 2015 - 150 miles from my home in Derby, East Midlands I realised this is what I was passionate about, so I decided to commit more time, effort and resources into growing the blog - however not everyone was supportive of this decision and I had push back from people who seemed determined to weigh me down.

This was when I made the decision to end the toxic relationship of 5 years with my ex-partner and it has been one of the best decisions I have made for myself - in hindsight, the relationship was incredibly emotionally abusive and it stripped me of my confidence and self esteem. Although it didn't work out, I am thankful that he introduced me to Airsoft and without this, I wouldn't of found my strength. Although I appreciate that some people will be uncomfortable or angry reading this, it is the raw and honest truth.

I left my team in May 2015 to enable him to play Airsoft with them and I began travelling the UK every weekend playing new sites, meeting new people and attending events. Playing Airsoft, travelling and meeting new people helped me restore my confidence and self esteem - I lost a lot in those few months but I had found myself.

Since May 2015 Femme Fatale Airsoft has gone from strength to strength and it isn't without sacrifices and hard work, and I would do it over and over again, no matter how often I hear the phrases 'You are only successful because you are female' or 'You are only successful because you are pretty' - these are the most insulting comments I have been dealt because I was given my gender and physical appearance, I have worked and fought for everything I have. What people do not realise about myself is that I have 2 jobs and I have quit jobs to enable myself to do what I do - I go to work in the morning and when I return home I continue working on the blog often pulling all nighters, I have travelled 600+ miles to visit and play Airsoft sites and I don't get to do a lot of girly things anymore such as shopping for expensive clothes and shoes or go on nights out because that is time and money that could be spent on doing what I love. I don't do what I do for the gear or money - I do it to encourage, educate and entertain players in a hobby that I have fallen in love with.

The highlights of FFA include meeting and talking to so many of you - I LOVE hearing your stories and getting to know my followers, making life long friends through a sport/hobby I love, building loadouts with the help of some amazing supporters within the community, attending the events that have taken me the breadth of the United Kingdom, experiencing everything Airsoft has enabled me to do, becoming the only female Airsoft Journalist in the UK for the UK's number one Airsoft magazine - Airsoft Action and travelling to IWA with them, being nominated for the Best Blog in Popular Airsoft's Players Choice Awards and there is more to come.

Thank you all for following, engaging with and reading FFA - without my followers this would not be possible.

Here's a few photos which I feel show how my loadout has progressed since the start of FFA.


  1. Awesome!! Airsoft = love. Keep up the good work.

  2. Awesome!! Airsoft = love. Keep up the good work.

  3. I actually played against at that day at Ironsight on early 2015. Thought it was good to see a girl playing (always healthy for the sport, eases off the macho bullshit a little) at the time, but no one could have predicted you doing as well as you have. Keep it up - it would be great to shoot alongside you again sometime.


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